A long recap for the missing 3 months of blogging

Where have I been all this while? What happened to me? Why the missing for three months of blogging? Well.. There are just too many to write & to tell actually. However, I'll try my best to simplify my happenings so that this entry won't be too draggy, too long and too damn boring for you people! ;)

How was BODYJAM 49 at LM Q2 workshop in KL?

It was fun. Quite an interesting experience & a fine opportunity not to be missed. We had a great time; Leo, Azyei & I. I actually couldn't sleep the whole night prior to the event. Excited? Nervous? Maybe. Some glitches happened here and there but overall it was a superb presentation. Might be our only chance to be on stage with LMAP presenters after all, so yeah we did our best & had super fun time shaking our booty with them! ;)

What happened after Q2?

A LOT had happened.

It started with a minor spotting on Q2 day (spotting: tiny brownish rubbery textured discharge). My period was supposed to be due by then but the spotting was too weird to be defined as menstruation blood. Plus, I had experienced frequent mild lower abdomen cramps few weeks prior to that day. Did pregnancy self test and it turned out to be positive. I was worried because the signs I was having might lead to a not-so-good outcome.

Visited my regular ob/gyn in SJMC the next day. The baby was 5-weeks old and looked good. I had 'missed abortion' or 'missed miscarriage' symptoms and was scheduled for the next check-up in one week time. I was given folic acid to aid early baby growth (as usual) and dydrogesterone to treat missed miscarriage cases.

The following week, baby has grown to 6-week old and looked better. Clear heartbeat was detected on the ultrasound. Can't describe how relieved I was on that particular moment. Was given more dydrogesterone and folic acid. I was due for the third check-up in two weeks time.

The spottings finally stopped on the 10th day, ie three days after my second check-up. However, it returned again a day before my third ob/gyn follow-up. I was so worried. Visited the hospital the next day and the ultrasound showed that the baby was not developing well (measuring 6cm at 8 weeks old). I couldn't even see the heartbeat anymore. I was told by doctor to continue my folic acid & dydrogesterone, and come back in two weeks time for another check-up. She told me that there might still be hope but if it's a missed miscarriage case, then I might have to think about having a D&C procedure.

I was devastated.

I couldn't wait long enough and went to SJMC the following week on Friday, 26th June 2009. The doctor confirmed that I had missed miscarriage and said that I could have my D&C done the very same day if I was emotionally ready. I talked to mama and Bard and held back my tears all the time. I decided to have my D&C that day. I had my bloodwork done and waited for my turn to be up at the Daycare Surgical Unit. However, I was sent home that very day as there was a mix-up information happening between my caregivers and so my D&C was pushed to be done the next day.

I went home and cried my heart out on Bard's shoulders.

On Saturday, 27th June 2009, I went to SJMC with Bard on tow. I was pretty nervous as this is very first time to be in a real OT. My hands & feet went ice cold. The nurses there were a bunch of sweerhearts! They talked, consoled & joked just so that I didn't get all stressed out before the procedure. The anaesthetic doctor is something else. He has a persona of a stern discipline teacher and the way he looms himself from one patient to another was quite, errr, scary. But he's kind to me, hehe. The procedure took place at about 9.20am. I was put to general anaesthetic and slept through the whole procedure. I woke up at 10am and everything had gone smooth & well. I was given a 2-day MC and went home at 11.30am.

Mama stayed at home and took care of me for three days. I recovered very fast and was on food 'confinement' for 3 weeks long (mama's advice). I joined Shape's night run (for fun) on 25th July and adidas KOTR on 2nd August 2009. I didn't manage to get any medal for both runs but I'm proud cause I managed to complete the run successfully even when I had my D&C done about a month before. I am healthier now and ready to try for another baby soon! :)

Social life during the "MIA"?

Ha! As I said, right after I recovered from my D&C I started exercising lightly and managed to participate in two big running events. Well, that's MY social life so yeah, it made me feel happy, heheh.

Watched Merchants of Bollywood at Istana Budaya (courtesy of Alec Chen) and mygosh, it's super-AWESOME! The energy, the dance, the music, the DANCERS! Wow, wow, wow! We enjoyed it very very much! Thanks Chen! :D

Had a small surprise birthday gathering for Bard in DU on 23rd July (don't forget the superdelicious Go-Go-DIVA! cake, thanks loads to Aribiah Murugagu Baroqbah Marqonah al-KUNTUM Adjma'ieeeen) and a birthday-cum-karaoke-party with the Harunsz guys on 24th July (lurveeee the Spice Girls-cum-PCD-cum-N'Sync show, hehe!).

Watched a dance theatre performance by DBKL titled Sardu on 26th July and what a superb show it was! Had a great long chat with our beloved dance sifu, Encik Jasni Hamid after the performance.

The following weeknights were spent in Auditorium DBKL watching Festival Tari Malaysia. All six zones had done their best and I appreciate their dedication & effort to make this festival happen. Well done Malacca, Penang, Sarawak, Selangor, Johore & Sabah! As I expected, Sabah bagged most of the FTM awards, taking away with them 5 trophies for 5 catagories and cash amounting RM55,000! Like, super-WOW!

Went to The Curve on 2nd August to support a friend who planned to go to the audition for the Biggest Loser Asia (but he arrived too late & the registration was closed, schucks!). I ended up watching 'The Taken (or Taking?) of Pelham 123' instead. What a superb movie! Two thumbs-up for the genius plot, awesome script and outstanding performances by the none other John Travolta & Denzel Washington. Oh yeah, I also managed to catch all the blockbusters on the big screen (some with friends, some with family) such as Ice Age3, Transformers 2 and Harry Potter 6.

Coming up next, picnic with Harunsz! Oh yeah!

So in conclusion, my life after my pregnancy loss is not so depressing after all, right? ;)

How about BODYJAM?

Hmmm.. I have not taught BODYJAM class for soo soooo long! I don't know if I can remember how to teach it, haha. But I still enjoy the program very much. How can I say no to a good cardio workout that combines crazy dancemoves & heartpumping awesome music? I cannot say NO! I'm thinking about taking a long break from teaching though. A long long looong break ;)

How about family?

After my D&C, I have not visited my mama until now. Reason? Both of us are busy. My brother Faisal is now working in Ipoh, as a lecturer in a college. My sister Fara is currently in UTP Tronoh. So my mom were being kind of busy and hectic. These two kids of hers left to Perak Darul Ridzuan week after another. When my sister came home for a short break, she dragged my mom to accompany her while she's doing her assignments at public wiFi areas (alasan mama nak melepak kat Mydin je tuh, konon kat situ wiFi senang, cheh). And now my brother is back in town for a week because the college he's teaching at are closed due to H1N1 precautionary measures. So I think my mom's life is kind of hectic herself lately :)

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So basically, that's what happened within those missing three months of blogging. Hope you guys didn't puke or sleep while reading this long and boring entry, hehe. Till then, see ya in the next entry! *muacks*

This Is Not Easy

This comes with responsibility. This is not about the limelight. This is not about the glamour. This is pure passion. This is pure work. This is what we take seriously.

BODYJAM 49. HERE WE COME.

Weird Feeling

I think I should be happy. But somehow I am not THAT happy. There are other priorities in my life at the moment. Things that I really look forward to and so ready to have. But not THAT one. I have never seen it coming. I would be lying if I said I didn't feel anything. Of course I do feel SOMETHING.

I felt honoured.

I felt like my existence is somehow noted.

I finally felt OUR existence are noted.

I felt as if I was being acknowledged for the hard work done all these years, for OUR hard work and efforts all these years.


Honestly, I feel relieved that somehow, my sister is finally at the brink of getting off the hook. The hook that's somehow silently strangling her, choking and spitting lies which claiming her choices were blinded by favouritism. Her judgements were clouded by misleading mists of friendship. That she is a person who values one by their colour.

If one of us does get this, I hope that would shut the hell their bloody mouths up. I don't really care if it's only for mere 5 minutes or the whole 55 minutes of public display. I don't care who gets it, as long as it's one of us.

As long as it's one of us.

And if one of us does get it, I'm so gonna celebrate it! ;)

Magis :)

Playing with camera can be superfun. Especially for a beginner like me. There are so much to discover, so much to learn! I experimented this and ended with these pictures. For this so-called experiment, I used Amsyhar's & Nadia's rubber ball, shot in my room. In these experiment, only these two balls were used in all three photos, and the positions of the balls remain the same in these photos. Let's see if you can spot the difference, heehee. Of course a pro can tell immediately. It's the most basic thing in photography :)


In the first photo, everything looks like how it really looked in reality. The yellow ball was placed slightly further behind and therefore it should appear relatively smaller compared to the red one in front.

In the next picture, the yellow ball becomes slightly bigger. It's the same ball with the same color & size as the one you see in picture above. The spacing between these balls were uninterupted.


And in this picture below, the size of the yellow ball grew till it's almost the same size as the red ball in front!

How photography and the usage of telephoto lense can fool ones eye eh? Macam nie kalu, Azyei boley jadik tinggi la dalam gambar-gambar aku! Ahakssss..

CHEATER!

I cheated. Ha ha. Big time. And I'm not shy to admit it!

I had the feeling that I won't be able to complete the whole Orange BHP 11km run today WITHOUT walking. And walking was what I did, almost half of the whole 11km stretch at least! Terrible terrible me. I was out of gym for almost 3 weeks now and it sure does take a toll on my fitness level. I didn't have any specific target today. Just hoped that I won't faint or vomit while running. And I managed to stay sane and well until the end of the LONG journey. That's quite an accomplishment for me really :)

Niens finished way too early and she was standing at the Finish line along with Pat, Renee and Lilian. She ushered me to the water station soon after I crossed the finish line. I was parched! Of course, they did provide one water station, but it was so sunny this morning and rather warm too :P. I felt unusually uncomfortable when I was running just now. Felt like running at 9am rather than 7.35am.

I started cheating when I saw Rizal walking ahead of me and that was only 4.40km (according to my Nike+). It was a super-brief walk with the shortest chat session I've ever had with him. I started running again and walked for the second time with my new partner in crime - Amir. I resumed running until I saw the water station, stopped briefly for two small cups of isotonic drinks, and continued running until it was 7.70km on my Nike+ distance tracker. The sun was high and I could feel the heat pulsing under my skin. The heat bothered we, a lot. I fastwalked almost all the time, until I reached the finishing line. Heehee.

It absolutely wasn't my superb record, and time-based-running was certainly not my motivation just now. I finished the run at 1 hour and 18 minutes (Nike+ time). Azyei came close at 1 hour 22 minutes. Leo followed 5 minutes later. 10 minutes later Jenny crossed the finishing line too. Arib, Harunz's strongest runner, finished at 57 minutes. Rijal, Eusopth and Ant all finshed at 1 hour 10 minutes, give or take. Amir and Rizal completed the run by both arriving safely at around 9am and 9.15am. Well done Harunz! Way to go! :D


I used my Nike Equalon 3, for the third time now. My first Equalon 3 experience was in Langkawi when I ran 8.02km on SAND at 46 mins 21 sec. My second usage was on 22nd March 2009 (my last run before the BHP Orange run) in Lake Garden and the shoes butchered my right sole with an awfully painful and a rather huge blister. There were blood in that blister too. It was totally painful. This morning I braved myself and utilised my Equalon 3 again. And I was FINE! Ha-ha! Maybe because I was running AND walking, so it wasn't that brutal on my feet this time :D


So basically my record today:


Time: 1 hour 18 mins 41sec

Distance (official): 11km

Distance Nike+: 12.37km

Average pace: 6mins 21 sec per kilometer

Calories: 597kCal

Shoes: Nike Equalon 3



Well done HARUNZ! Well done to myself! And well done to all Orange BHP runners today! ;D

Adapting

When a person tells you this:

"I adapt to your life."

What does THAT make you feel?


1. Content because you realized your life is what matter most to others?

2. Super pissed?

3. Just realized you've been a controlled freak all this time?

4. Satisfied?

5. Feel so damn powerful cause you managed to incapacitate their choice of life?

6. Terrified?

7. Upset because you unwittingly forced others to change?

8. Confused?

9. Just realized that others are actually unhappy to live life the way you do?

10. Utterly sad?



So tell me what would you feel.

Tell me.

Taking A Time Off

After faling in and out of sickness for so many times this year, I finally decided to take my time off from teaching BODYJAM. Just for a month, in case if you're wondering. The timing couldn't have been better. Work at the office is getting more and more hectic, I basically stayed in the office late almost everyday eversince I return from my long MC.

What long MC? A very, very long MC after Langkawi trip my dear friends.

I doubt I got the illness from Langkawi, but lack of rest, excessive heat and too much sun and sea could be the main culprit which caused me the high fever and the prolonged cough. I haven't recovered from my cough when I went to Langkawi but it got even more worse after I had the high fever.

Amsyhar started the sickness chain in the family, being the first to have high fever at temperature of 38.3C complete with vomit and diarrhoea. The next day both kids started coughing and having runny nose. So I took two days EL courtesy of the kids. Sunday night my temperature raised to 37.5C and my whole body ached. I honestly didn't think four consecutive BODYJAM classes from 19th - 22nd March was the reason why I had the bodyache. I suspected I might be having a bad case of flu. So on Monday I went to Poliklinik Kelana Jaya and had a check up done. The doctor had my lungs X-rayed and she theorised that my long gone asthma is revisiting me again. All this time I was never on the pump. I finally got my own that day. The pharmacist gave me her curious look when I told her that was my first inhaler of my life and I don't know how to use it. After two pathetic tries, I went home with the inhaler, a packet of paracetamol and a bottle of cough syrup. No medication was given for my suspected flu.

Monday night my temperature shot up to 39.7C. After taking paracetamol, my temparature varied between 38.6C - 39.7C. My whole body ache like hell. I tried taking the inhaler with hope it'll releieve my coughings. Too bad, it only caused me major headache soon after using it. I didn't feel any difference and it didn't 'control' my coughing whatsoever. Fever got worse. Runny & blocked nose got worse too. Headache kicked in too often. I fell in and out of sleep and lost my sense of time and what's happening around me.

Tuesday morning I went to a private clinic in the neighborhood. I seriously didn't have the strength to wait for hours at the Poliklinik, just to get a WRONG prescription by the doctor. After the longest 30 minutes of wait, I got to see the doctor. No blood test were taken since I didnt bear any evident signs of dengue or chikugunya. I was given a two-day MC and I was adviced to have my blood tested if the fever continues till Thursday. This doctor also told me that I don't have any asthma since my lungs were very clear despite my violent prolonged cough.

Thursday, I went to the office thinking I'll be okay. Bad news. I was NOT okay. Bodyache still there, but not too strong. Cough got worse. Phlegm & nose secreation were both thick and yellow in colour. Gross. I was like a half-dead at the office. I even forgot HOW to reply an email ok. My mind suddenly went blank and I stared at the email thinking how the hell am I suppose to do to reply this thing. It was that bad. Back at home, Nadia was having fever. Her temperature varries between 37.8C - 38.3C.

On Friday morning, I brought Nadia to SJMC for check up cause her fever didn't subside after 2 days of constant home medication. She was immediately been given a suppository tablet to reduce her temperature. Then her blood was tested. She's such a brave little girl. The amount of blood taken for the test was A LOT okay. Nadia had bacteria infection in her blood and was given a 5-day course of antibiotic. After SJMC, I drove myself to the private clinic and got myself a 3-day course of antibiotic for the prolonged cough. Another MC for me.

So yesterday was basically my first day back to the office after my Langkawi holiday. And my god, tonnes of work need to be done! I'm still coughing but it's not as bad as it was on last Friday. Still have runny nose but at least it's not as bad as it was on last Thursday. Right now, I'm still recuperating and totally on BODYJAM leave. It's good to finally rest, relax (?) and recover. Hope I'll get better soon! :)

I YELLED AT MY DOG IN AN ELEVATOR BECAUSE I THINK I NEED SOME SERIOUS HELP

I was tagged by The Lady and hahaha, I can't help but laughed real hard when I did this! Seriously, you guys should go ahead and try it! It's useless no doubt but it's fun so what the heck, just try laa ok :D

Type out the sentence you end up with, as the TITLE of your blog, post it, and tag your friends.
1. Pick the month you were born:
January - I kicked
February - I loved
March - I karate chopped
April - I licked
May - I jumped on
June - I smelledJuly - I did the Macarena With
August - I had lunch with
September - I danced with
October - I sang to
November - I yelled at
December - I ran over

2. Pick the day (number) you were born on:
1 - a birdbath
2 - a monster
3 - a phone
4 - a fork
5 - a snowman
6 - a gangster
7 - my mobile phone
8 - my dog
9 - my best friends’ boyfriend
10 - my neighbour
11 - my science teacher
12 - a banana
13 - a fireman
14 - a stuffed animal
15 - a goat
16 - a pickle
17 - your mom
18 - a spoon
19 - a smurf
20 - a baseball bat
21 - a ninja
22 - Chuck Norris
23 - a noodle
24 - a squirrel
25 - a football player
26 - my sister
27 - my brother
28 - an iPod
29 - a surfer
30 - a homeless guy
31 - a llama

3. What is the last number of the year you were born:
1 - in my car
2 - on your car
3 - in a hole
4 - under your bed
5 - riding a Motorcycle
6 - sliding down a hill
7 - in an elevator
8 - at the dinner table
9 - in line at the bank
0 - in your bathroom

4. Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:
White - because I’m cool like that
Black - because that’s how I roll.
Pink - because I’m NOT crazy.
Red - because the voices told me to.
Blue - because I’m sexy and I do what I want
Green - because I think I need some serious help.
Purple - because I’m AWESOME!
Gray - because Big Bird said to and he’s my leader.
Yellow - because someone offered me 1,000,000 dollars
Orange - because my family thinks I’m stupid anyway.
Brown - because I can.
Other - because I’m a Ninja!
None - because I can’t control myself!

So… mine is “I YELLED AT MY DOG IN AN ELEVATOR BECAUSE I THINK I NEED SOME SERIOUS HELP.”

Hahaa! Lawak nak mampos kan? Ke tak lawak? Hehehe..

Now lemme tag :

1. Azyei
2. Zarina Ina (ntah aku suke je panggil budak nie cenggini)
3. Chot
4. Merah (if you're up for this tag game, AND if you're still alive, kekek)